Top Ten Reasons to Vote for Biden, not Trump

Hint: Not being Trump is a major plus

Do you miss David Letterman’s Top Ten List? Here is one in time for the 2020 elections:

  • Number 10: Biden can empathize with people, especially those who eat oatmeal every day for breakfast. And he can bring people together, such as his knack for drawing ire from both far-right and far-left activists.
  • Number 9: No more lunatics like Kid Rock crashing the White House. And no more Trump kids polluting the White House.
  • Number 8: Biden won’t cut Social Security, Medicare, the Affordable Care Act, college financial aid, public education, affordable housing, clean energy programs, and PBS. He will also keep the U.S. in climate change agreements. Imagine life without Elmo, Rick Steves, and Arthur. Not to mention without Social Security, Medicare, healthcare, or a habitable planet.
  • Number 7: When Trump tweets some incoherent, bigoted nonsense, he will only be embarrassing himself, not the entire United States of America.
  • Number 6: Celebrities like Matthew McConaughey and the Kardashians will revert to being covered more by television than the U.S. president. OK, maybe that’s not such a positive.
  • Number 5: The Alt-Right will be forced to go back to holding recruitment drives in their moms’ basements, not the halls of the White House.
  • Number 4: No more far-right, partisan pep rallies of screaming, unmasked mostly white people on the South Lawn in violation of the Hatch Act and COVID-19 precautions.
  • Number 3: Super wealthy people will have to pay more of their fair share of taxes again.
  • Number 2: Five words — Liberty and Justice For All. And four words — Make America Think Again.
  • And the top reason to vote for Biden [don’t waste your vote on a third-party candidate in this important election]: Russian dictator Putin will lose his office at the White House.
Make America Think Again [Kevin Shay photo]

Written for 45+ newspapers/mags. Written some books — see Visited 48 states, 30+ countries.

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